Every two to three years, researchers update the findings of the Harvard Study of Adult Development—now spanning 85 years and counting. Their consistent message brings a light of optimism to our understanding of what truly constitutes wealth: sustained health and happiness come from investing in relationships.
The Research Behind Relationship ROI
Since 1938, this groundbreaking study has followed 724 men and more than 1,300 of their descendants, asking thousands of questions and producing hundreds of measurements. Their unchanging conclusion? In the researchers’ words, “if you want to make one decision to ensure your own health and happiness, it would be to cultivate warm relationships of all kinds.”
This finding’s simplicity can be jarring, particularly when many of us spend the majority of our time, energy—and yes, money—on other pursuits that bring only passing satisfaction.
Redefining Investment: Your Portfolio of Relationships
In our role as financial advisors, we regularly receive countless communications about new financial products and investment opportunities. While these merit careful consideration, they remind us of an incongruence in our modern world: the gap between what we’re often urged to prioritize and what research consistently shows leads to true well-being.
Let us be clear: traditional financial planning and investment integrity remain vitally important. However, at Colman Knight, we recognize that your financial portfolio is just one of many portfolios you cultivate in life.
A Framework for Relationship Investment
Drawing from ancient Greek wisdom, let’s examine different types of love to help us understand and diversify our relationship investments:
- Eros: Romantic or passionate love
- Phileo: Fraternal or friendly love
- Agape: Unbounded, universal love
- Storge: Familial love
A Mindful Practice: Evaluating Your Relationship Portfolio
We invite you to engage in a thoughtful journaling exercise to explore your relationship investments. Find a quiet moment and a comfortable space where you can reflect without interruption.
Preparing for Reflection
Before beginning, take a few moments to center yourself:
- Find a comfortable seated position
- Take several generous breaths, filling your lungs, belly, and back
- Allow your thoughts to settle
- Bring your awareness to what matters most to you, nestled in the center of your heart
Journal Prompts for Exploring Your Relationship Portfolio
Take your time with each question. Let your responses flow naturally, without judgment. Set a timer for 10–15 minutes if that supports a clear nourishing structure. You may want to revisit these prompts periodically, as your insights may evolve over time.
- Who is in your portfolio of relationships? Consider the different types of connections in your life and how you nurture them. Don’t forget to include yourself as a relationship too.
- What is your ROA (Return on Attention)? Examine where and how you invest your time and energy in relationships. Remember no critiquing, just open exploration.
- Where do you feel most alive, peaceful, joyful and loved? Identify the relationships and situations that bring you genuine fulfillment.
- How are you allocating resources to optimize your relationship portfolio? Consider how your financial decisions support meaningful connections. For example, allocating resources on opportunities to nurture relationship connections – dining, dancing, traveling, classes.
Reflecting on Your Insights
After completing these prompts, take a moment to:
- Review your responses with curiosity and compassion.
- Notice any patterns or revelations that emerge.
- Are any ROA’s out of balance?
- Consider what actions or changes you might want to explore.
- Acknowledge the value of taking time for this reflection.
A Holistic Approach to Wealth Planning
At Colman Knight, we believe true wealth management means supporting all aspects of your prosperity—financial and relational. Our integral approach helps you:
- Balance financial goals with relationship investments
- Make decisions that support both monetary and personal growth
- Create strategies that honor all dimensions of your wealth
- Build a legacy that includes both financial and relational assets
Your Next Step: Cultivating True Wealth
If inspired, please engage in this reflection practice about your relationship portfolio. As you discover insights about your relationship investments, we’re here to help you align your financial strategies to support what matters most.
Ready to explore how your financial planning can better support your most valuable investments?
